This is the guest post I wrote about the other day. It is written by Melanie, a young lady striving to serve the Lord with her whole heart. She has a passion for serving the Jesus and others. Through her words and conduct it is easy to see that she loves her Savior and endeavors to love Him more. Here is her wonderful post:
“Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain…”
What a different message our culture preaches to us! With the “standards” of Hollywood, no wonder purity has slowly faded into the background of our modern day lives. It seems as if it is an “old-fashioned” word…or something that few people can claim as their own.
It is so important to remain pure, both physically and emotionally. But it’s not as if remaining pure is a cold “command” the Lord gives us. Rather, purity is an invitation into the heart of our Heavenly King, where He asks us to love Him with our whole hearts and give Him everything (Luke 9:23).
Question 1: Why do you believe it is important to remain pure emotionally as well as physically?
Physical purity often seems to be an easy thing for people to understand. In our culture’s thought processes, a person refrains from sex --and there you have it -- they are pure. But physical purity isn’t just refusing to “cross the ultimate line.” Christ says: “I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot. I could wish you were cold or hot. So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth” (Revelation 3:15-16). Why do people dabble in sin and think that is okay, as long as they don’t actually have sex? Christ says to “flee youthful lusts” ( 2 Timothy 2:22). People are not cultivating a heart that runs from sin when instead of fleeing, they “stand in the way of sinners” or “sit in the seat of scoffers” (Psalm 1). They are not actively running from sin, but rather seeing just how close to the line they can get --whether that is through “making out” etc. Christ commands us: “For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s” (1 Corinthians 6:20).
Emotional purity seems to be something that many people in today’s world do not grasp or understand, but it is just as important as physical purity. Our beloved Savior said: “But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28). When we let our minds wander --even if we are not “lusting” after someone--we are failing in one very important area. It is our duty as children of the King to be dwelling on whatever is “…true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things” (Philippians 4:8). Our hearts are to be “set on heaven” --looking to the things eternal. When we allow our minds to be consumed by thoughts of someone here on earth instead of dwelling on our Heavenly Father and serving Him, that person becomes an idol in our lives. We are dethroning our King, and letting something creep into the place that He ought to hold in our hearts.
Question 2: What does remaining emotionally pure mean to you?
To me, emotional purity means the following:
“If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth. For you died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God”
(Colossians 3:1-3).
It means keeping my mind focused on my Savior in this season of singleness, and also doing the same when I am married. Consider these verses:
“There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world—how she may please her husband”
(1 Corinthians 7:34).
If I fail to learn to look to the Lord as my everything now, then when I do fall in love, that man will begin to take Christ’s place in my heart. Christ needs my absolute allegiance, both in married life and single life. Something else I know is that my earthly lover will be a sinner, and he will not always be able to give me everything I need. Therefore, if I have not learned to look to Christ as my all, then when my earthly husband fails me I will become bitter and resentful. It is not fair for me to place the burden of perfection on my husband.
One last thing. If I am not cultivating a heart that is emotionally pure now as a single young woman, what prevents me from impurity emotionally when I am married? Now is the time to begin cultivating purity within my heart so that it will always be loyal to my Heavenly King, and earthly husband.
Question 3: What are some specific things you do to guard your heart and not awaken love before it's time?
One thing that always sobers me when I am interacting with other young men is the thought of “What would their wives think if they were watching right now? Would they feel honored, and if they were someday given the chance, would they thank me for spurring their future husbands on towards a deeper relationship with Christ?”
Second, and even more convicting, for me, is considering what my future husband would think if he could observe what I say, how I act, and what my thoughts are as I interact with the young men in my life. Would he feel cherished, adored, honored, and respected?
But what challenges my heart the most is the thought of “is my Savior pleased with me right now?” Ask yourself this as you interact with young men in your life. My goal is to be “conformed to the likeness of Christ.” Is my spirit one of servant hood, or selfishness? Am I seeking to spur them on to glorifying Christ, or am I desiring that attention and glory for myself?
I often find that if we keep the Lord at the center of all our conversations, the fellowship I have with the young men I know can be so encouraging, and educational. That does not mean you have to be talking about, say, “theology” the whole time, but if Christ is reigning in your conversation, then He will be glorified and you will be honoring that friend in the meantime.
My goal in life is to point others to the heart of our Savior and encourage them in pursuing Him. Therefore, when I am interacting with young men, it is my ultimate desire to draw them closer to the Lord. I never desire to make them notice me, but rather Him! Our goal should be to serve them, not to make ourselves feel “liked.”
Question 4: If you could give girls one piece of advice or encouragement what would it be?
I don’t even have to think twice. :)
It would be to pursue Christ as your First Love. As young women, we do desire to be loved and cherished. There is no better place to find that fulfillment but in your Savior’s arms, until the time comes for you to fall in love with the man He has ordained for you. And even in marriage, Christ must hold the first place in your heart.
His arms are opened wide, awaiting for You to come home. He is waiting…yearning…to offer you the romance of a lifetime….with Himself, and with Your future spouse. Surrender your heart to Him and learn to know Him as your First Love, and you will find all the fulfillment you could have ever wished for. And with Him, dreams --the dreams He has for you and is willing to make your own heart‘s desire-- really do come true.
For…
“Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” (Proverbs 31:30)
What a different message our culture preaches to us! With the “standards” of Hollywood, no wonder purity has slowly faded into the background of our modern day lives. It seems as if it is an “old-fashioned” word…or something that few people can claim as their own.
It is so important to remain pure, both physically and emotionally. But it’s not as if remaining pure is a cold “command” the Lord gives us. Rather, purity is an invitation into the heart of our Heavenly King, where He asks us to love Him with our whole hearts and give Him everything (Luke 9:23).
Question 1: Why do you believe it is important to remain pure emotionally as well as physically?
Physical purity often seems to be an easy thing for people to understand. In our culture’s thought processes, a person refrains from sex --and there you have it -- they are pure. But physical purity isn’t just refusing to “cross the ultimate line.” Christ says: “I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot. I could wish you were cold or hot. So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth” (Revelation 3:15-16). Why do people dabble in sin and think that is okay, as long as they don’t actually have sex? Christ says to “flee youthful lusts” ( 2 Timothy 2:22). People are not cultivating a heart that runs from sin when instead of fleeing, they “stand in the way of sinners” or “sit in the seat of scoffers” (Psalm 1). They are not actively running from sin, but rather seeing just how close to the line they can get --whether that is through “making out” etc. Christ commands us: “For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s” (1 Corinthians 6:20).
Emotional purity seems to be something that many people in today’s world do not grasp or understand, but it is just as important as physical purity. Our beloved Savior said: “But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28). When we let our minds wander --even if we are not “lusting” after someone--we are failing in one very important area. It is our duty as children of the King to be dwelling on whatever is “…true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things” (Philippians 4:8). Our hearts are to be “set on heaven” --looking to the things eternal. When we allow our minds to be consumed by thoughts of someone here on earth instead of dwelling on our Heavenly Father and serving Him, that person becomes an idol in our lives. We are dethroning our King, and letting something creep into the place that He ought to hold in our hearts.
Question 2: What does remaining emotionally pure mean to you?
To me, emotional purity means the following:
“If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth. For you died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God”
(Colossians 3:1-3).
It means keeping my mind focused on my Savior in this season of singleness, and also doing the same when I am married. Consider these verses:
“There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world—how she may please her husband”
(1 Corinthians 7:34).
If I fail to learn to look to the Lord as my everything now, then when I do fall in love, that man will begin to take Christ’s place in my heart. Christ needs my absolute allegiance, both in married life and single life. Something else I know is that my earthly lover will be a sinner, and he will not always be able to give me everything I need. Therefore, if I have not learned to look to Christ as my all, then when my earthly husband fails me I will become bitter and resentful. It is not fair for me to place the burden of perfection on my husband.
One last thing. If I am not cultivating a heart that is emotionally pure now as a single young woman, what prevents me from impurity emotionally when I am married? Now is the time to begin cultivating purity within my heart so that it will always be loyal to my Heavenly King, and earthly husband.
Question 3: What are some specific things you do to guard your heart and not awaken love before it's time?
One thing that always sobers me when I am interacting with other young men is the thought of “What would their wives think if they were watching right now? Would they feel honored, and if they were someday given the chance, would they thank me for spurring their future husbands on towards a deeper relationship with Christ?”
Second, and even more convicting, for me, is considering what my future husband would think if he could observe what I say, how I act, and what my thoughts are as I interact with the young men in my life. Would he feel cherished, adored, honored, and respected?
But what challenges my heart the most is the thought of “is my Savior pleased with me right now?” Ask yourself this as you interact with young men in your life. My goal is to be “conformed to the likeness of Christ.” Is my spirit one of servant hood, or selfishness? Am I seeking to spur them on to glorifying Christ, or am I desiring that attention and glory for myself?
I often find that if we keep the Lord at the center of all our conversations, the fellowship I have with the young men I know can be so encouraging, and educational. That does not mean you have to be talking about, say, “theology” the whole time, but if Christ is reigning in your conversation, then He will be glorified and you will be honoring that friend in the meantime.
My goal in life is to point others to the heart of our Savior and encourage them in pursuing Him. Therefore, when I am interacting with young men, it is my ultimate desire to draw them closer to the Lord. I never desire to make them notice me, but rather Him! Our goal should be to serve them, not to make ourselves feel “liked.”
Question 4: If you could give girls one piece of advice or encouragement what would it be?
I don’t even have to think twice. :)
It would be to pursue Christ as your First Love. As young women, we do desire to be loved and cherished. There is no better place to find that fulfillment but in your Savior’s arms, until the time comes for you to fall in love with the man He has ordained for you. And even in marriage, Christ must hold the first place in your heart.
His arms are opened wide, awaiting for You to come home. He is waiting…yearning…to offer you the romance of a lifetime….with Himself, and with Your future spouse. Surrender your heart to Him and learn to know Him as your First Love, and you will find all the fulfillment you could have ever wished for. And with Him, dreams --the dreams He has for you and is willing to make your own heart‘s desire-- really do come true.
For…
“Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” (Proverbs 31:30)
1 comment:
Well said. True contentment can only be found in the arms of our Saviour.
Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
Elisera
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